Since it's been about three weeks since I last hinted as to my "happs" I figure I'll go ahead and break 'em off with a little preview of the remix...or, rather, a summary.
When last we met I was midway through September and fresh off my encounter with a local delicacy. I can tell you that not long after that I came face to face with another of China's "特菜", or specialty foods: the dreaded, infamous, more-rubbery-than-you-would-expect chicken toes. Verdict: better than the eye, but that is certainly hurtling a very lowered bar.
But, but, butbutbut! I don't want to spend this time talking about the food I have eaten, will eat, or any ensuing processes. I wanna bust out the photey-photes.
Last weekend I journeyed with several of my classmates and their roommates to Xishan (which translates simply as West Mountain), the mountain right outside Kunming's Western (surprise?) city limits. It's pretty great. Aside from it's numerous restaurants and hostels that guarantee a fun-filled weekend trip, as well as the universal accessibility granted by an auto road and chairlift, Xishan boasts a scattered collection of pagodas and the Dragon Gate, a complex and overlapping temple complex (did he just use that word twice in this sentence?) that if you wander long enough would be sure to give you some kind of complex (well, that was unnecessary). But I digress too far into poor linguistic play. I would rather this not be a display of the gradual shrinking of the English part of my brain, but rather a chance for me to put up some images like ohmygodcheckthatout.
Maybe that's actually a little small, but you've got the city there, as well as a whole lotta Dian Chi (the lake). It certainly is breathtaking, but the color of the water really is too good to believe - it's more likely due to extreme pollution than to any magical natural qualities of Yunnan water. From atop Xishan, you can watch the boats as they paint strange murals on the lake with the dark red algae and muck that their wake draws up from the depths. It's pretty, pretty bittersweet.
Continuing on from the Dragon Gate, the terrain quickly becomes harsh and moonlike - apparently a product of the beautiful natural process known as acid rain. After scrambling about on jagged outcroppings for a good half our and getting only about a third of the way into the moonscape, we called it quits, but not before snapping a few more photos.
That right there is the future - the many mountains I shall cli - er, summit (they better have chairlifts) - after Xishan.
And no, I didn't take the chairlift up, but who was I to say no to a little trip down relaxation lane on my... my trip down the mountain... lane.
That's really it for now. The rest is dumplings, failed bike journeys, and, of course, Karaoke.But wait a second, here. Let's talk Karaoke, or as it's known here, KTV. Why do Americans have to go to Koreatown to find this? It's great! I mean, in China it's pretty fun, but the fact that you are definitely not in Kansas does pose problems for your average expat. First off: the majority of songs are Chinese (so surprise). A lot of them are catchy, and in fact "legitimate jams", but I can only read characters so fast. Luckily Chinese pop songs stick to very strict rhyming schemes, so even if I mumble through the first part of the line I can belt out the last syllable. "mmfdmfdmm bai, mgmmmgmmgm lai, mfmdmfmmfmmd gai, mfmdfmdmfmdmm aiiiiiiiii!"
The second problem is in the selection of American hits these KTV places tend to offer. There's your expected Beatles hits, some Michael Jackson ("Liberian Girl", really?), and something by Rod Stewart you've never heard of. Moving into my own childhood there's ample NSync, Britney, etc. to keep you going, but when you move a little farther forward it gets real messy. The Chinese people seem to have an odd fascination with Rihanna, and a sort of knowledge gap when it comes to several of my personal favorites. It's hard not to be disappointed when the only thing by R. Kelly is two separate versions of "Hair Braider" - what's a man to do if he wants a little Ignition(Remix)?
Okay, really, now I'm done.
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